If you have ever modified your actions or opinions with the mere intention of pleasing others, it is likely that you have experienced the weight of the “need for approval”. This is an extremely common psychological phenomenon, which arises when self-esteem or self-worth is conditioned to external approval.
But sometimes, this search for validation can turn into a significant emotional obstacle, interfering with your ability to express yourself authentically and limiting your life potential. So the question arises: How to identify, understand, and overcome this need for approval?
This is the crucial theme we will address in this article. Throughout the text, we will reveal the subtle signs that indicate an excessive need for approval, explore the psychological roots that may be behind this need, and address effective strategies, based on scientific evidence, to overcome this behavior.
We will also discuss how clinical hypnosis, a methodology increasingly adopted in therapeutic contexts and recognized by various federal health agencies, can be a significantly empowering tool in this process of overcoming.
And you might be wondering: “What does hypnosis really have to do with this?” The truth is, it has a lot to offer! Amidst a growing body of research, hypnosis has gained prominence as an effective means of facilitating the change of automatic thoughts and behaviors. Its process, based on inducing a focused state of consciousness, helps people understand and change the way they interpret and react to their environment, reducing self-censorship and increasing self-acceptance.
If you long for more authenticity in your life and the awakening of your true potential, we are sure you will find valuable insights in the content that follows. Happy reading!
Defining the Need for Approval from a Psychological Perspective
The “need for approval” is a behavioral pattern where the person incessantly seeks positive affirmation, acceptance, or validation of their actions and choices from others. This search can become a detrimental problem when it exceeds healthy limits and impedes autonomy, generating anxiety and emotional strain.
In psychology, the need for approval is associated with low self-esteem, emotional insecurity, and affective dependency. Moreover, it reflects the importance given to others’ opinions, often more valued than one’s self-perception.
It is important to emphasize that it is natural for humans to desire approval and acceptance, as it is part of our social essence. However, it becomes concerning when this need turns into an obsession, compromising the person’s mental health and well-being.
Overcoming this pattern depends, above all, on self-knowledge and self-development. Understanding that others’ opinions do not define who you are is the first step to deconstructing the excessive need for approval.
Health professionals dealing with clinical hypnosis are especially prepared to assist in this overcoming process, providing tools and techniques that favor this journey of self-knowledge.
Identifying Symptoms of the Need for Approval
The need for approval can be identified through various behavioral and emotional symptoms. Perhaps the main one is the obsession with pleasing everyone, even if it means sacrificing one’s own needs and desires. Those who suffer from this dilemma may be afraid to express opposing opinions, fearing rejection or criticism.
Moreover, the difficulty in saying “no,” even when necessary, is another relevant sign. This happens because the person fears that denying a request might generate rejection or disapproval. In this sense, the constant search for approval can make decisions based entirely on others’ expectations and opinions.
Excessive self-criticism is also associated with the need for approval. The person may always be comparing themselves to others and feeling that they are not good enough. The fear of making mistakes and perfectionism are other signs that may indicate this need, as the person believes that any mistake can generate disapproval.
It is important to note that symptoms vary from person to person. Furthermore, we all seek some social approval. However, when this search becomes excessive, it can harm emotional well-being and mental health. Knowing these signs is the first step to seeking help and overcoming this challenge.
Clinical Hypnosis as a Treatment Tool
In therapeutic approaches, clinical hypnosis is a promising tool for treating the need for approval. This technique focuses on changing automatic behaviors and thoughts associated with the constant need to please others.
In this process, hypnosis enables the patient to connect more deeply with their inner self, allowing a better understanding of their motivations and desires. This facilitated access to emotions and thoughts helps the patient identify and modify limiting beliefs and enhance self-esteem.
Clinical hypnosis seeks to work on self-acceptance, helping the individual perceive themselves as a unique and valuable being, regardless of others’ opinions. This directly contributes to the process of freeing oneself from the need for approval.
Throughout the treatment, hypnosis stimulates the development of healthy coping strategies. This involves learning to deal with criticism and rejection, developing the ability to accept one’s imperfections and overcome the fear of disappointing others.
It is important to emphasize, however, that hypnosis is not magical: it acts as an adjunct tool to conventional therapy, with proven effectiveness in numerous studies, recalibrating how the individual interprets and reacts to the external world. Therefore, the ethical and responsible use of this technique is essential for achieving effective results.
Evidence-Based Strategies to Overcome the Need for Approval
There are several effective strategies that can help people with an intense “need for approval” to better deal with this issue. The first step is awareness. Learning to identify this behavior in oneself is fundamental. Then, working on self-esteem becomes essential. Knowing how to see and value one’s qualities allows for the construction of a positive internal image independent of others’ opinions.
Another strategy is knowing the difference between authenticity and conformity. Being authentic means honoring your genuine feelings, thoughts, and desires, while conformity involves shaping yourself to align with others’ expectations. Thus, cultivating authenticity can be extremely liberating.
Finally, but not least, the final layer of this approval blanket is restructuring how you link personal value to external judgment. It is interesting to understand that criticism and disapproval are inevitable and part of everyone’s daily life. Therefore, it is worth working so that they do not disturb you as much.
With proper guidance, these strategies can be greatly enhanced with the help of clinical hypnosis, aiding in strengthening the sense of identity and reducing the need for external acceptance.
Impact of the Need for Approval on Relationships and Professional Environment
The impact of the need for approval can be especially noticeable in relationships and the professional environment. This constant search for external validation can create unnecessary tension and generate unnecessary conflicts.
In personal relationships, for example, this pursuit can lead to scripted and inflexible behaviors. The person may feel compelled to always please the other, even if it causes discomfort to them. This can result in one-sided relationships, where the person gives excessively without receiving the same in return.
In the professional environment, the need for approval can be an obstacle to development and progress. People with a high need for approval may have difficulties taking risks, innovating, or even expressing themselves authentically due to fear of what others might think.
A particularly challenging aspect is that, in many cases, this need for approval is masked or minimized. The person may not be aware that their actions are being guided by this need, making it more difficult to identify and treat.
Always remembering the influence that context has on our attitudes, clinical hypnosis can be a powerful tool to change how people interpret their environment and react to it, helping them overcome the need for approval in favor of a more authentic and balanced life.
Dangers of Pleasing Everyone: The Price of the Need for Approval
The need for approval can turn into a dangerous task due to the relentless pursuit of pleasing everyone. Although the desire to belong and be accepted is inherent to humans, it is crucial to observe the limits so that it does not compromise emotional health.
After all, no one can please everyone, and living with this expectation can be quite exhausting. The constant need for approval can lead to stress and anxiety, as when the desired approval is not achieved, a vicious cycle of self-criticism and self-devaluation begins.
This need can also be costly in terms of personal and professional relationships. The attempt to please everyone often leads to conformity to avoid conflicts. This can lead to inactivity, preventing the expression of opinions and suppressing one’s needs to meet others’.
Furthermore, it can hinder decision-making, with choices based on what is believed to please others rather than what you truly want. Consequently, this can lead to frustration and personal dissatisfaction.
By understanding the dangers implicit in the need for approval, it is possible to seek therapeutic measures, such as clinical hypnosis, to better deal with it and minimize its harmful effects.
Strengthening Self-Esteem to Alleviate the Need for Approval
The key to overcoming the need for approval lies in strengthening self-esteem. Healthy self-esteem occurs when you value yourself regardless of externalities. You are not seeking yourself in others or needing their validation to feel complete.
As professionals wishing to use clinical hypnosis to help with this challenge, some useful strategies you can apply involve nominalizing emotional states of self-affirmation, such as confidence and self-love. This is a simple yet impactful technique that can help people more fully experience the feelings they desire.
Mentioning these names at critical moments in the session, repeatedly, will impregnate the person’s mind, enabling a different perspective on themselves. Yes, you are helping them create their own positive narrative!
Another strategy is the conscious use of metaphors. Metaphorical narratives are powerful because they stimulate the imagination and allow the individual to find their own answers to their dilemma, thus increasing their sense of self-efficacy.
Finally, encouraging the practice of self-compassion can be a turning point for many struggling with the need for approval. Self-compassion involves treating oneself with the same kindness and understanding that one would treat a dear friend.
You can use all these strategies in clinical hypnosis to strengthen your patients’ self-esteem and thus help them overcome their need for approval.
In Summary: Overcoming the Need for Approval
This article explored the complex issue of the “need for approval”: how to identify, understand, and overcome this common emotional obstacle. We identified the signs and symptoms of this need, understood the psychological roots, and presented effective strategies to overcome it. Mainly, we highlighted the importance of clinical hypnosis as a potential tool in the process of overcoming.
Using clinical hypnosis, it is possible to stimulate the change of automatic thoughts and behaviors, increasing self-acceptance and reducing self-censorship. Hypnosis allows for a deeper connection with oneself and facilitates the identification and modification of limiting beliefs, being a great ally in strengthening self-esteem and overcoming this obstacle.
The need for approval is a challenge that many people face, but with the right tools, it is possible to experience greater authenticity, aligning with one’s own values and desires instead of others’ expectations. It was a pleasure to share these insights on this journey of self-knowledge and overcoming.
Are you interested in learning scientific hypnosis to apply professionally? To enhance your results in your current profession or even have a new profession? Discover the evidence-based hypnosis courses and postgraduate programs from the Brazilian Society of Hypnosis through the link.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is clinical hypnosis effective in treating the need for approval?
Yes, clinical hypnosis has proven to be an effective tool in helping people identify and change negative thought patterns, such as the constant need for approval. However, it is important to remember that each person is unique and may respond differently to treatment.
How can I acquire self-knowledge and self-development to overcome the need for approval?
There are several ways to work on self-knowledge and self-development, including therapy, mindfulness practices, or reading self-help books. Additionally, the regular practice of self-compassion, accepting oneself as they are, can be very helpful.
Is there a specific profile of people who have a great need for approval?
Not necessarily. The need for approval is a normal human behavior, but it becomes a problem when it exceeds healthy limits and interferes with self-esteem and personal satisfaction. Everyone, regardless of profile, can exhibit this need to varying degrees.
How can I identify if I have an excessive need for approval?
Your own behavior is an indicator. If you often change your opinions and actions to please others, fearing rejection or criticism, you probably have an excessive need for approval. However, this self-assessment can be complex, and professional assistance is recommended.
Can clinical hypnosis when treating the need for approval have any side effects?
When performed by qualified professionals, clinical hypnosis is a safe process with no known side effects. However, it may bring a series of emotions to the surface, making the person feel vulnerable or uncomfortable initially, before they start experiencing improvements.
